Reflection / John Shaughnessy

In praise of Cheerios, hair clips and young adult parents who live their faith

Let’s give some appreciation for Cheerios and Goldfish crackers, the small, edible wonders that often have a magical way of keeping toddlers content in the pews of a church during Mass.

And here’s to the makers of hair bands and hair clips, easy-to-reach-for fashion accessories that mothers of young children use to get out the door in a rush to church with their family.

Still, most of all, let’s shower a heaping amount of praise on the parents of young children who make the time, the amazing effort and the incredible commitment to get their small children to Mass, all in the belief that their Catholic faith is a gift that they want to give and share with their offspring, all in the hope that their children will eventually know the love of God deeply.

So let’s have an abundance of admiration for the mom who had to change a diaper at the last second when she had everything packed for her baby, for the mom who had to suddenly scrounge up a clean pair of pants after her child fell into the mud, for the mom who hurriedly herded her children out of the house and into the car or van, all the time wondering if she packed enough Cheerios, Goldfish, bottles, books and toys to get everyone happily through an hour of Mass.

And let’s also sing great praises for the dad who carries a car seat—with a baby in it—with one hand and holds another child in his other arm, while also balancing a backpack filled with everything that his wife has packed.

Dan Hollowell holds his son Michael during an Ash Wednesday Mass on Feb. 14 at Our Lady of the Most Holy Rosary Church in Indianapolis. (Photo by Sean Gallagher)

Not so long ago, this mom and dad pledged their lives and their love to each other—and openly declared their willingness to welcome children into their lives.

After a time, they also brought their children into the Church, having them baptized.

And now here they are, making every effort to follow through on their vows, to live their faith, to share their faith that they view as a great gift.

And now here they are, a whirlwind of a young family that has settled into the pew right in front of you.

So, what do you do? Smile or cringe? And how do you react when a child cries or the Cheerios fly?

As a Church, we lament, like all faiths, the decline in worship of young adults. A 2021 study by the Center for Applied Research in the Apostolate based at Georgetown University in Washington led to these statistics: 13% of Catholic young adults attended Mass at least once a week while 21% attended Mass at least once a month, 31% attended Mass a few times a year, and 36% rarely or never attended Mass.

They are sobering statistics—and they reflect a reality that haunts many parents of young adults in the archdiocese. Yet, as the Church focuses on efforts to bring wayward Catholic young adults back to the fold and into a deep relationship with Christ, we also need to embrace the young adults and young families who make the time, the amazing effort and the incredible commitment to live our faith.

Sometimes that begins with a small gesture of appreciation.

At the end of a Mass when a young family sits in the pew in front of my wife and me, a usual scene happens: The young parents almost look like they have been in the midst of a tornado, and sometimes their looks express a feeling of defeat and even failure, as if they are wondering if all their efforts to bring their children to God have been worth it.

Amid such moments, I have witnessed my wife routinely smile at the young parents and tell them how wonderful it is to see their family in church, and what a great job they are doing with their children. Without exception, the young parents break into smiles and their slumped shoulders raise up.

As we reach out for the young adults who have strayed, let us embrace the ones who have stayed.
 

(John Shaughnessy is the assistant editor of The Criterion.) †